uploading for fscking idiots

Internet dialup is a cruel joke. I’ve been uploading my website for 28 minutes now. The whole thing is barely one meg in size. I’m using a quality USR 56K modem and supposedly connected at 45,333 bps.

31 minutes… I am trying to run IE windows in the background, just to grease the bianary wheels and make sure any data is getting transferred at all. Hmm, same results as I get without IE windows in the background. God damn, this entire process takes me less than a minute at school.

35 minutes… good. CuteFTP just gave up. Gave up. As though the strain was so great that CuteFTP leapt out of its cubicle, flipped out at its co-workers, stormed out of the office and shouted obsenities at the heavens while stumbling home, half-drunk with rage.

40 minutes… it’s a good thing CuteFTP has a happy-time smiley face folder for an icon, otherwise I’d be homicidal right now. Excellent, now it’s putting files in the wrong folders.

48 minutes… doing a manual search of the sight, trying to find files it chose to not upload. I’m sure any computer-savvy person is amused by my misfortunes, thinking “Computers are reliable. Compuer’s don’t choose or choose not to do things. Computers do exactly what you tell them to do.” No. No, no, no my friend. I am computer savvy and what I am experiencing with this crappy Internet connection defies catagorization.

59 minutes… I’m averaging a 1.4 KB/s upload time. I apologise to anyone trying to call me right now.

60 minutes…. I give up. I’m gonna head outside and see if I can catch up with CuteFTP. Please enjoy the fragmented remnants of Cromlech until I get the chance to finish the upload.