February 14, 2003

sweet merciful crap!

Happy Valentine’s Day, ya’ll! The run of crap continues, and today we’ve got a wonderful dish that will make your loved one(s) quirl all the way to the bedroom and/or backseat and/or kitchen table.

LOBSTER STICKS TO MAGNET!

This one is only for those that are stout at heart. It’s big, it’s red, and it’s magnetic!


I wonder… if you removed your ears, would the lobster still be able to claw up and bite your eye? Judging by his attack on the rabbit the lobster is able to jump pretty high, but I don’t know if that’s because of hidden muscle mass in the lobster’s spindly legs or because of his magnet.
But does the lobster have an internal magnet, or is he just made of steel and sticks to magnets?

I believe the song explicitly states that the lobster is supplied with an internal magnet, but I am also huffing paint thinner. Either way, the lobster is obscenely, voluptuously magnetic, and I like it.