September 9, 2003

Pr0ntropy

Tonight we’ve been enjoying Homestarrunner.com. A friend (who has enjoyed previous lives falling off cliffs, picking cactus needles out of his hands and being the Voice of Reason) has been enjoying an evening in the same vein with TechTV’s Real Life Cheat Codes. He asked if I remembered the address for Lobster Sticks to Magnet, a past favorite. I said of course, called up my archives and found the link.

And I was aghast to find that history’s home of Lobster Sticks to Magnet had since degraded into a pr0n site.

But this, this is the entropy of the Internet, my friends. Sad to say, but pr0n is the natural state of the web. Left to its own devices, untouched by the good (or ill) of man, the web will all inevitably turn to pr0n. And this does not even result from the actions of humans, mind you. Just as particles always move from a more to less dense space, from an ordered to an entropic state, so the Internet creeps towards absolute pr0nolization. No sinister intelligence or Evil Genius is required for the decay of the web.

But it seems the Universe has made a bizzare choice for the natural state of complex digital information networks. Traditionally it is believed that pr0n needs to be actively created, that it requires ahem human intervention to result in its existence. The likelihood that pr0n would just spontaneously pop into being as the inevitable output of a complex system seems nearly impossible.

Yet here is an example where Lobster Sticks to Magnet was left to its own devices, only to end up scandalous. Currently it is not in a very sophisticated or developed state, sure. The ladies are not professionals; the website says that outright. And their pictures are grainy and saucy enough to be driver’s license photos in a twisted burlesque country. And the page doesn’t specify which character encoding or DOCTYPE is to be used, and even when we override those shortcomings it returns 165 errors in the W3C’s Markup Validator.

But there are glimmers of intelligence, that should brighten the day of all evolutionists who believe that intelligent life can indeed awaken in the scums of our entropic little universe. At the bottom of the page, we see this:

WEBMASTER MAKE BIG MONEY.

Whoa. What speaketh here? Is it Neanderthal or Caveman? Eliza or Speak ‘n’ Spell? The Incredible Hulk or James Hetfield?

Whatever it is I like what it’s saying, even though it is a bit at odds with reality.


So, let me get this straight, p0rn has become the backdrop (or self propogating basis of) the internet and you find the trend disturbing since A) The picture quality is poor B) The webscript was written by a hick from WV with bad eyesight and an overbite C) It over wrote the Lobster Stick to Magnet site that was your second fav. about 5 years ago after the Indian music video fad…
I can understand that this can upset you. The propagation of p0rnography on the net is immence. But if we took p0rn off the internet very little of any substance would be left to actually be a profitable medium of information exchange.
What was the link to the Indian Music video… Is that now Hindi p0rn?

Dude, I just reread the #WobblyWorld.txt. That was fucking hilarious. We need to do that again some time.
And by the way, when are you online these days? We never seem to intersect… I’m online at home in Japan now so there is NO EXCUSE. Much news there is to tell, there is.