July 15, 2001

jurassic memories

Jurassic Park was on television last night. I forgot how much I loved that movie, how much I felt justified seeing it at least four times in the theatre… June 11th, 199something… ’91? ’92? I remember I saw it with Michael Gunelson the day after I had an end-of-the-year party. It was supposed to be a sleepover, but everyone got sent home after throwing a whole box of cookies at the t.v. while watching Aliens.

After seeing Jurassic Park we left for some lame Boy Scout trip. Interesting how things come full-circle, as I was first introduced to Michael Crichton’s famous book on a Boy Scout campout many months before. Why, I actually read the paperback copy with the old Jurassic Park cover on it; before they changed it to reflect the logo in the movie. Yeah, just like polyester, Hawaiian shirts, Dax Wave and Groom and bowling shoes, I was way ahead of the trend on that one.

In the early morn on that camping trip, Mitch Axelson and I were in charge of cooking the bacon. It quickly caught on fire, so as my father tried valiantly to douse the flames we just danced around chanting “Put out the bacon, put out the bacon!” Our tribe later sat in trees and exchanged dirty jokes and then we retreated into the woods… we talked about how much our explorations were resembling the movie Fire in the Sky. ‘Five guys went into the woods… only four returned.’ Some fat kid got spooked as a result and bailed back to the campground, paring our group down to the mentioned four. Then we climbed up a hill to explore an ice cave. It had rusty chains, likely used to imprison Ice Giants.

When I watched Jurassic Park I cried. Really. It was so damn beautiful. In the wise words of Tyler Zenner, “Yeah, I’d pay to see live dinosaurs.”

I would too.


July 11, 2001

a pathetic geek story

Startling discovery of the day:

Vaseline Intensive Care Advanced Healing Lotion with Vitamin E heals severely dry skin. The ‘severely’ is indeed underlined, but it is not a hyperlink. Fooled you. Despite its claim to be fragrance-free it is fortunately not, as it has the smell of woman. The scent of the essence of woman. It makes my knees quake and my heart race. It touches nerve-endings long dormant, arouses feelings of intensive love and ubiquitous severity.

Inhale deeply…

Ahh, yes.

And in conclusion, I need to get out more. Way more.


July 5, 2001

how right?

Time to get angry.

“If you think billions of barrels of oil will stay in the ground, you’re smoking pot.”

-Representative Don Young (R-AK)

So you’re right on two counts. Now your point, Mr. Young?


July 4, 2001

close to my heart

Happy 4th ya’ll. …course, I’m willing to bet that most of you will not receive this salutation on the 4th, seeing as how no one (including myself) keeps tabs on this site during the summer, and I probably won’t even upload this greeting until sometime in August. Nevertheless.

Umm… I feel somewhat obligated to say something, seeing as how my June Blither archive is going to include the staggeringly minimal two entries, and bad ones at that. Perhaps this should not be repeated in July. I will try for three this month but I know it won’t happen.

Oh, seeing as how it’s already August, those links in the Tempo Chronicles are probably fixed by now. Oh yeah, I stuck the whole thing under Bio where it is nice and close to my gun. And my heart.

Begone.