Damn. Just. Damn.

Fret not, for today we have not forgotten the Flash crap! In fact, we’ve got a double dose of crap!

Homestarrunner.com is one of my new favorite sites. Strong Bad answers his email and, acting on a fit of inspiration, draws the BEST. COMIC. EVER.

But then, what next? The story can’t possibly be over that quickly, can it? Nay! Issue Two has just been released!

CHILDREN!

Conclusions to draw from the international war protests:

Pithy signs and creative puppets are valid substitutes for rational discourse on the morality of war.

The weapons inspections can work, nevermind the fact that even if they do, Saddam remains in power. Nevermind that Saddam has rejected proposals for U2 survellience flights, more inspectors, lighty-armed accompanying forces, etc, etc, etc.

The Iraqi people deserve to be oppressed by a ruthless dictator that has killed one million people and exiled four million more from a country of only 30 million. Are the protestors racist? You bet.

The U.S. needs to be attacked first before an attack on Iraq is justified. 9-11 doesn’t count.

While the United States is backed by Britian, Australia, Poland, Albania, Slovakia, the Czech Republic, Hungary, Qatar and Kuwait, war with Iraq would still be classified as a unilateral attack.

War protestors are not aware of the ironic implications of Neville Chamberlain’s words, “Peace in our time.”

Protestors still don’t know that International A.N.S.W.E.R. is a front for the Worker’s World Party. Hope ya’ll like communism. And Milosovich. And North Korea. And Saddam. These guys love ’em.

Frankly, I’m real tired. I think the idiots will get the world they deserve.

You thought it was done? You thought the vast fields of Internet crap had finally been picked over? Nay, dear reader. Nay, indeed. Flash animations are the modern equivalent of a million monkeys hammering away on a million typewriters, and I am still making runs into the monkey stables to see what jewels can be separated from the mess. It looks like the cover of that Green Day CD in there.

Tech writer JeffK comes up with the most persuasive argument ever for switching from Windows to Linux.

Bill Whittle over at Eject! Eject! Eject! has posted the most beautiful, most inspiring prose I have ever read on the internet. It’s about Columbia. It’s about flying. It’s about courage. It’s about what it means to be human.

One day, I was on a solo flight in a small, single-seat sailplane � a glider about the size of a bathtub, with long, thin, very efficient wings.

It’s usually dry in the Mojave desert, but this was still early spring, and the San Gabriel Mountains were covered in snow. Wind hitting the mountains has nowhere to go but up, and so that’s where I was � 80 knots, plenty of speed to get out of trouble � and perhaps two wingspans away from the trees. I was so close I could see squirrel tracks in the snow. Just thinking about a turn was all it took, and I ran the contours of those mountains certain that I would never have to come down.

And then I saw something I have never seen before or since. Off my left wing, between me and the mountains, moist air was being pushed up so fast that it was condensing, turning into cloud before my eyes. It was like an inverted waterfall of smoke, and there I was, dipping a wing into it. The power of all that lift, the force and the speed of it, all that free energy � and somehow, we hairless, gibbering, bickering monkeys managed to figure out a way to grab it and ride it. I remember thinking, Four billion years of struggle and evolution put me in this seat right now. Billions of dead people spent their lives dreaming of what this must be like.

And as I looked away from that upward rushing waterfall of air, I saw ahead of me another sight I had never seen before or since, for the sun was setting below a cloud layer, yet above a lower one, and there we were, just me and Shiny McShine � caught in an envelope of purple and gold glory that would make the most heavenly Hallmark card look like something done on an Etch-A-Sketch.

…though taking out an excerpt is like running with scissors through the library. Please read the whole thing. It made me cry.

The working world grinds to a halt on the weekend, but the grimy gears of Web Crap continue on and on at their petty pace.

Do you ever go through your day and feel that you haven’t gotten your recommended daily fix of Indian Pop? Is your style of dance getting stale? Are you fascinated by blue screen technology? We’ve got the cure for what ails:

Tunak Tunak Tun! (requires RealPlayer)

Daler Mehndi (all four of them) is quite possibly the coolest person alive right now.

The Spontaneous Combustion Jazz Sextet Valentine’s Day Throwdown at the Blue Max tonight was fantastic. The crowd dug our band so much we honored some drunken song requests. By the end of the night our cigar box was brimming with cash, and we walked away from the place with $40 apiece. I’m probably gonna spend all mine on pr0n and a box of wine, but ya know, whatever.

On the drive back we stopped at Rob’s place so Pat could pick up his bag and head over to his girlfriend’s place for a midnight candlelight dinner. While giving Dave a ride back to his apartment we picked up a very cold, very appreciative hitchhiker and gave him a ride back to campus.

“What are you guys listening to?”

“Presidents of the United States of America.”

“Oh man. These guys were cool.”

Happy Valentine’s Day, ya’ll! The run of crap continues, and today we’ve got a wonderful dish that will make your loved one(s) quirl all the way to the bedroom and/or backseat and/or kitchen table.

LOBSTER STICKS TO MAGNET!

This one is only for those that are stout at heart. It’s big, it’s red, and it’s magnetic!

Fark has picked up on the photo of the protestor in Harmony, Minnesota that couldn’t keep his Mr. Rogers separate from his Mr. Roberts. The photoshopped results are disasterous and wonderful.

Poor guy. Before the internet he could have just slunk back into his small town anonymity. Just goes to show it doesn’t pay to protest a war that makes sense.